Nags Head, NC, 2013 - Master Po, Mrs. Po, Amy Po Fo and grandkids head to Outer Banks early Saturday morning, August 10. Plan is for Amy Po Fo to drive first shift, but that change in morning. Master Po start out at the helm when Amy not feel comfortable backing out of driveway in New Enterprise.
Kids are groggy and sleep on and off for first part of trip. And Mrs. Po not hit panic state yet as trip goes well through PA, MD, WV and N.Virginia. “Panic State” is found at various geographic locations throughout US. Master Po never sure where it really is, but when we hit its boundary, everyone know it – for sure.Master Po pull into Waffle House lot without incident, but women and girl grandkids have to pee. Full bladder make both women super strong, in a hurry, and ready to enter state of Panic. As both women thrust heavy door open to lav (like Black Friday store sale) poor Nick, honorable grandson, not paying attention and run cheek under eye into hard handle on women’s’ lav door. Nick spend next 8 days with red cheek and no doubt refer to stop as Awful House for rest of life.
Nick, with red cheek bone from violent thrust of restroom door in Waffle House
After serving usefulness as driver for first third of trip, Master Po sent to retire to back of van with grandkids. Not only is this good idea for kids, but Master Po cannot hear panic-like conversations with women in front seats – they take turns driving and navigating all while Master Po get stares from other travelers in other cars during slow traffic. They no doubt think family give up on pap pap and send old man with special needs to rear of van so he not interfere with drivers. Meanwhile pap and kids have great time, especially pretending to tickle sharks above us as we drive under the sea in submerged bridge in VA. Women if front seats not too impressed with our actions as both have hit PANIC buttons well before bridge. We arrive at Nags Head with only minor difficulties.
We eat supper at Pizza place as soon as we get into town and then check in to our rental house. No surprise to Master Po but two curses that follow vacationing women to their destinations take place. First curse is that air condition point directly to sinus area on forehead of some women. To make matters worse this follow Mrs. Po around unit, no matter where she go. She let us know with graphic description of condition while making a fist and thrusting it into her forehead just above the eyes. This curse has no cure – only thing to do is turn AC down in ALL ROOMS and to take all clothes off baby. Even more odd, this curse follow some women to restaurants, stores, even cars as the AC only hits the poor sufferer square in the middle of the sinus area. Despite suggestions, Mrs. Po refuse to wear hat too.
Second dreaded curse take place as women try to decide who sleeps in which bedroom in rental unit. Master Po thought they had this figured out well before we got there – but was told to place luggage down in neutral area of unit until final decision can be made. Master Po (multi time heart patient) finally told to take luggage to upper most unit, and place in furthest bedroom down hall. He then collapse and take two hour nap. He awake on couch with kids around him and ask where are women. He not surprised they STILL UPSTAIRS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT IF BEDROOM SELECTIONS ARE GOOD. This second curse have nothing to do with comfort and selecting room of preferred choice. This curse come from some women’s tendencies to feel horribly and want to do the kind Martar act of punishing themselves all the while sacrificing the better bedrooms to others. Mrs. Po inherit this curse from her mother, and pass it on to Amy PoFo too. Jury still out as to who has the curse worse.
Other than getting swamped while in my beach chair, not paying attention to tide and collapsing head over heals in another chair while in dry sand, Master Po not have any more bad mishaps all week. In both incidents, women laughing so hard at Master Po they cannot render assistance. And in both incidents, he just sit there like beached whale until he regain balance and can get up. Funnier yet, when Master Po get up and look around, NOT ONE PERSON IS LOOKING AT HIM. Master Po too smart to think no one see him fall twice – he know people are looking away to not embarrass him – after all how can crowded beach not see old man stuck in beach chair, while laying on his back, with feet over his head. By the way, chair break too, and get thrown away. At least Master Po not strike head in sinus area above eyes and suffer from brain freeze. He have to head to surf to get sand off beached body too.
Only one more minor incident to report. Master Po get up in middle of one night with chapped lips from sun and wind. He know he forget to pack chap-stick, but being well prepared he did pack small tube of Neo-sporin anti-bacterial ointment. When he apply to lips, he first wonder why lips feel so refreshed – and then realize he has Mrs. Po’s small, traveler’s tube of Crest tooth paste in his hand. Because of grit in paste, he get unwanted exfoliation of skin as bonus while treating his chapped lips. He not have to remind you – this not feel real good.
Playing cards with Ana and Nick in unit with AC not set very cool. Ana is getting used to taking her clothes off. Let's hope she grows out of this habit while still an infant.