Master Po continue to grow old very gracefully. He and Mrs. Po go to Walmart during pandemic and Master Po, always thinking ahead, wear protective mask to keep him from getting virus that originate in homeland.
He also wear ball cap, sunglasses and has beard, dyed brown, too. He dye beard so he not look 120 years old.
He purchase dog food and can of Flex Seal. Flex Seal not a seal, gifted in gymnastics or dance. Flex Seal seen on tv to fix leak in gutter.
During self check out, (Note: Self checkout at Walmart not mean checking self
for hernia in groin.) Self checkout supposed to be speedy way of getting out of Walmart before someone with no mask sneeze in your direction and give you Virus, called Kung Flu by President Trump.
Dog food register OK going thru self check out, but alarm goes of when I try to scan Flex Seal. Master Po throw hands in air and give the "I give up signal," thinking store detectives on way over to me and throw me in jail. I prepared to yell, "Be gentle as I just discover bad hernia during self checkout." But, I not have to.
Well-meaning lady with mask come over to me and
say something to me, but Master Po not understand her with mask covering her lips. Master Po forget to put hearing aids in ears before he leave house and he cannot understand lady without reading lips. He realize this on way to Walmart when Mrs. Po have to repeat everything she say 22 times.
Lady slide mask down and Master Po, always aware, discover that lady has no teeth, which compounds hearing problems tremendously.
Finally I manage to understand what she asking Master Po. She say, "Are you over 18?" Master Po want to shake her hand and kiss her cheek for being so complimentary to me. But, One, she have no teeth, and Two, with my luck, she be carrying Kung Flu Virus, too. So, I just say, "Yes, I am quite a bit older than 18, and I thank you for the compliment."
Later I find out, she not being complimentary as there are chemicals present in Flex Seal that make it illegal to buy if under 18. Master Po not sure if they are explosive or poisonous, but he now know that they dangerous for people under 18, but not dangerous for us old folks. Apparently government not care if old people get hurt or sick from Flex Seal, but they worry that young people might suffer.
I feel good leaving store thinking that toothless lady must think I pretty young looking. Good feeling not last very long however.
On way home we stop at Burger King - only place we eat since Kung Flu hit our area. Drive thru line very long, but no one parked in regular parking lot, so Master Po venture in with mask, sunglasses, dyed beard and ball cap.
He order without much trouble until young lady ask, "Do you want any sauce for your chicken tenders?" (Note: Chicken Tenders are not chickens with hernias, discovered at Self Check out lane at Walmart.) Chicken tenders are like McNuggets only using different cooking grease.
Master Po say, "Yes, I will have the uh, ... uh.. it's not sweet, uh, uh, it's not sugary, a, a, It's mustardy, I think, but I'm not sure what kind. It's not hot, and it's not uh, uh., " This go on for good while till young lady say, "Oh, do you mean Honey Mustard?"
Master Po humbly say, "Yes, thank you." but he not surprised that lady not think he under 18 years old. She not say anything else to Master Po, but I get feeling she have good laugh with others working behind counter.
Guessing she tell them, "You should have seen this old man with dyed beard and dementia ordering just now. He couldn't hear, couldn't think, couldn't talk, and he walked like he had a hernia."
Warning to others! Be careful during this pandemic, and keep eye open for seals that might be flexing their flippers around you. Seals feel they lose freedom if they wear mask, too. And barking seals can spread nasal fluids.
